How
to Simulate those
First Class Luxuries!
I
will tell you what Priority Boarding is - waiting in a spacious lounge
for the last possible moment before you squeeze into that flying sardine
can!
Remember that only the last one to board gets to walk down the isle and
select the seat with most space and the least number of children!
If the plane is really under booked, you can select an empty row at the
back, collecting as many pillows as you can for a padded bed! Remember
to put one lap belt over your blanket so they don't wake you.
However, if the plane is full, at least you get your requested kid-free
emergency row, and you delay the inevitable crush in the terminal,
stretching your legs and making
calls on your cell phone because it always sounds impressive that you
are calling from the airport!
I mean who wants to board first anyway!! You are going to be crammed in
that little seat between two pooping strangers for the next few hours
(depending on delays and what they ate for breakfast!)
Who wants to pay an extra $1000 for a glass of orange juice and a coat
check!! Bring your own juice, and check your jacket into your hard shell
Samsonite suitcase. (I am assuming that you are an 'over-night
warrior'!)
Travel light and avoid the competition for overhead lockers. Swan about
the terminal shops with a fanny pack that holds your CD, your DVD and
the most important thing your mints!
Believe me my friends, your CD music melts away the stress airport travel,
and no one talks to you if you are wearing head phones (I often don't
even turn it on!)
Finally, by offering a mint to your neighbour, they rarely fight you for the armrest, and then you can sit back and watch the DVD you bought with the company money you saved by sitting in Economy but Flying First Class!!!!
©2000-2005 JB