Pre-board

Just watch them

They have to find space to squeeze that small trunk into the overhead locker to ensure that crushed look, having rolled it down a isle that is exactly 2 inches too short, thus hitting every seat on the way! 

They collapse in their seat with that 'phew- made it' and this is the first time they have relaxed since they got up 3 hours ago! So they immediately get the heavy pc out, boot up Solitaire and...  fall fast asleep! And they are the ones that got an extra hour in bed this morning!

Let them take the seat allocated to them! Fools! They are but sheep, and all the sheep board before the shepherd strolls in!

You are that shepherd! You finish your calls and board the plane at the last minute for you don’t have to fight for bin space! You make another call. You are now being more efficient by being early!

You board last, picking the best seat in the house. You checked in early and got your window seat, but you see that someone with a baby in front of you! But you see a whole empty row at the back, and so you allocate yourself that seat for the stewardess doesn’t know which is your seat! I used to just sit down in business class before they started checking names. 

You sit back, with your bottle of orange juice, your MP3 and packet of mints (see how to imitate first class) and prepare to enjoy the Mile High Club!

Now you will have to start by taking off some articles of clothing that can hinder the actual act - namely your laces, your wallet and you watch!

1 – take you wallet/keys out of your pocket - at a seating position they can dig into your thighs and leave nasty marks!  

2 – don’t be one of those that takes off their shoes and crosses their feet up on the bulkhead (count your self lucky if you don't know what I am talking about!) Just loosen the laces to give your feet circulation to relax. 

3 – take off your watch - because when you think about it, it is of no use up here in the sky! You have no control over when you arrive - The captain is in command now, and he will land when he gets there and not a moment before! Time is unimportant now! 

Sounds silly but it’s the old – ‘accept what you cannot change’. There is nothing you can do, so don't be like the Stress Monkey that is constantly looking at his watch! I want you to get into a relaxed state, and this mental image of being up in the air without any control is a start!! 

This is a great way to relax as the plane is taking off, leaving the ground, and all control you have over time. Imagine that you are hurtling through air, with no control. So you might as well relax! Sit back. Wear head phones and put on eye blinds. When else do you get the chance to do this?

Stress monkeys just get so upset in travel. They see the plane as a cage suspended in the air out of which they cannot get! They tell everyone how they hate travel, but you see the plane as a coffee shop in the sky - without a waiting line! Ok, it is a cage, in so far as it is caging everyone else out! Your boss cannot grab you, no-one can call you, and no-one knows what you are doing with your time in the sky - so lets use your 'Air Time'!

Your baggage is stowed directly below your set in the hold. Try to imagine that all your worries are in that suitcase! Imagine that all the work thoughts, all the things that stress you are located in your bag, and you are sitting above it – separated from it and stress free for the next few hours!

It’s a great way to slow down. Stow your mental baggage in the hold as well, and picture yourself in the main cabin without a care in the world.

The guy next to you is worrying about stuff. He brings mental baggage onto the plane! He is consumed with thoughts of the visit etc. And now he is staring at his watch, worrying about getting there on time!

All morning he has been fighting the clock, in traffic, at the gate, and he is still doing it now, looking at his watch hoping the plane will not be late, and in dread that his luggage didn't make the plane for he was late! He might as well be crushed in his luggage and all the mental baggage he brings along with him!

Sit back. Put on eye blinds. Play some meditation music (I will give you some here to download) and go over the baggage and watch analogy and try to attain a floating feeling!

Now you have stowed your mental baggage, taken off your cerebral watch and are in a relaxed state, you are ready to be initiated into the Mile High Club!  

©2000-2005 JB