'To the thirst that is yet to come!'

'Ah, top the mornin' to you ... and the rest of the day to meself! May you live in pleasure and die in debt!'

Scruffy Murphy here, giving you a few toasts from Ireland - 'The Land of the Toast and the Roast' for no matter what the Scots say - we are the Masters! Only the Irish could tell you to go to hell in such a way that you'd be looking forward to the journey! We can also make a toast sound like its an insult and then turn it into a compliment!

'I'll drink to your coffin! May it be made from the wood of a hundred year old oak tree that I intend to plant tomorrow!'

'May misfortune follow you all your life and never catch up with you!'  

And the classic Irish toast - 'May you marry an orphan' - i.e. may you not have a mother in law! (Actually after 22 years of marriage, I am beginning to develop an attachment for my mother-in-law - it fits over her face!!)

We Irish excel in  roast as well! Come into O'Laferties Pub for some good old Irish Abuse - a verbal kick in the wedding tackle! 

Come and get a Kick in the Charlies from an Irish professional! Come in and try to block a Doc Martin with your chestnuts! All meant in good taste of course!

What Irish poets would call a whack in the sack! What Trinity college Math Department call a right angle in the hypotenuse! What doctors in Dublin refer to as a patella in the baby makers! 

This is what we Irish Americans call lap-dancing! A little leather in the cotton! A Kenneth Cole in the tighty-whities!

See how we love to muck about with words - let the games begin! Next -Ireland Land of the Roast! 

©2000-2005 JB